Reflections on Memorial Day Reading

Generally on Memorial Day, I don't spend a lot of time doing much of anything. I spend time with my family, call my father and great uncle (veterans both), and give thanks to all those who have served and sacrificed so much so that I can live the way I live and shoot my mouth off about anything that crosses my mind. This year was a little different as I composed a fairly lengthy email for my brother who is now in Iraq and sent him a few pictures of my family (who refer to him as Uncle Tickles).

As has happened in years past, I have read a number of items about Memorial Day, largely presented in the press and the range of items is fairly impressive. Many of the items are heart-wrenching (which is the point I suppose) and some tend to be overly political in nature (at least this year). However, as the Iraq war progresses Memorial Day has taken on a different meaning for many Americans.

Some people still view it as a day to spend with family and friends, firing up the grill and swapping stories while the kids play in the pool or run around the yard. Unlike some veterans, who view the day with a religious intensity and view such scenes of carefree living as almost sacriligious, I tend to think that those who died in the service of this country would think of the activities as a fitting tribute to teh way of life they protected. This is not to say that such sun-worshipping activities should not be without moments of reflection, but I think it is what those who died would want.

In reviewing many of the items written about Memorial Day, I came across this one in the Washington Post by photojournalist Andrea Bruce, about a young sargent who was returning from Iraq. Bruce had a connection with Sgt. Andrew Snow, having been embedded with his unit in Iraq, and that connection is somewhat apparent. While the story is not particularly groundbreaking, the story does contain on interesting insight into the Iraq War that I think is very enlightening.

More than 100 people, mostly elderly, waved little American flags outside the country club. The mayor made a surprise appearance and gave a little speech. Andrew accepted the "Welcome homes" and the "God bless yous" and tried to answer "Is it really as bad as they say it is?" But war was not what he wanted to talk about. He wanted to chat with high school friends and tease the kids he used to babysit. He said thank you to each person. Then he sneaked out to the palm trees for a smoke with his best friend from high school.

"It was overwhelming," he told me after the party. "A lot of people trying to talk to me, congratulate me. I didn't really think I deserved congratulations." He said he knew the party was really for them -- the people holding the flags. For many of them, he is their only real connection to the war.(emphasis added)

The welcome home party was not really for him but an attempt to connect with a war that far too many people are disconnected from.

While I don't agree with those who say the war is unwinnable or that we shouldn't be there fighting in the first place, I can respect their opinion. But the fact that too many people don't have a connection to the war means that both our government and the media have done a poor job helping people make the connection. Arguably, the war is the biggest political issue extant right now and for many Americans it is an abstraction, an amorphous thing that is out there, one upon which most Americans have an opinion. However, that opinion is not connected in any way to the reality of the war. Most Americans don't worry themselves sick about a loved on in harm's way. Most Americans claim to support the troops, but don't do anything to show that support short of a little sticker on their car and some politically correct platitudes.

The fact that we have an all-volunteer force has to some extent dehumanized the war effort. During Vietnam, the draft was real and omni-present. It wasn't the fact that it was someone else kid from some far off city or state, it could be your kid or your neighbor's kid or your doctor's kid who could be called to fight in Vietnam. It made the risk of the war real, tangible and personal--even if you were opposed to Vietnam.

Today, an all-volunteer force shields most of America from the true cost of the war. For those who have no personal connection to the fighting, they can simply look upon Iraq as a political abstraction, another issue in the political arena that costs each person very little. It becomes easy for most Americans to look at the servicemen fighting in Iraq and think of them as something else--not someone they know, but an abstration, almost at automaton not to be thought of as a person, but as a tool, a tool of a foriegn policy they don't agree with and therefore incapable of making a personal connection.

But Memorial Day is that one day a year when we should be looking at our fighting men and women in hopes of finding a connection. The stories of Memorial Day, yes, are about the dead, but they are also about finding a connection to those who have gone to serve our country. If Memorial Day serves no other purpose than to make people see a connection to the living, breathing, and yes, sometimes dying, men and women serving our country, then perhaps it has served its purpose.